I still feel a touch of lingering remorse for my past actions.

what happened to tiny?

 

Welp, i suppose theres nothing i can do to save this thread. Damage control is out the window...sooo might as well make get hip, swiggity swooty, dank memes bank memes

Edit: its a real shame though. Though i suppose i was a fool for beliveing i could find help..on the internet of all places. Or rather this site anyways.

Edit no.2: i admit i still have a lot to learn about how the world works. However id rather not learn about it from people on the web. I know im at a standstill at the moment. But for a very good reason.

Technically i shouldnt feel that i have to explain myself, and yet im doing it again.

Isnt there a song somewhere?
"Aint it fun?, living in the real world? Aint it fun.. being all alone?" Etc etc

(At this point this is random flow of thought so i should prolly stop now)

 

do u have friends irl?

 

why are you pretending to care?

This IS the internet after all, where only the strong survive and the weak perish.

Home of SJW and millenials.

Edit: if you are being sincere however. I did, but not anymore, ive grown..distant from them. In my very first post i meantioned how i dealt with my lonliness. It may be "cringy" to some, but it kept me together at the time.

Its the possibility of being rejected by other people at that time, that caused me to seek refuge inwards. At the end of the day i found temporary peace.

 

I should have known id have to face my own demons again... as this really does feel like cutting open an old wound and throwing salt in it.

This is my fault, it appears that this is my trial by fire. And im going to be put through the wringer. Its been far too long..

 

That was just a random example. Though would you rather have me use memes?

 

Life is slowly starting to lose more and more of its color every minute.

God has abandoned us.

There is no hope.

 

bruh the cool thing about the past is that it STAYS in the past
nobody had to know ANY of this
this is what people pay therapists for

 

yeah u need a therapist
or make some friends and see how normal ppl interact

 

Im going to do that. Theres so much i want to say, perhaps somethings are better left unsaid.

I realize that i may not have the qualites of a self actualized person yet, but i know that with time, hopefully not only can i share my world with people, but things get better for me overall.

Ignore this last part if you want, but i feel i need to do this.

 

gey

 

its a good song tho lmao. But i chose it in actuality for this line, "tell me whats the matter, why do you look so sad, come on talk to me, if youre feeling mad, and i'll try and make you feel alright"

Perhaps i should have said that instead of leaving it open to interpretation.

Anyways.. my previous statement stands about seeking help

 

I've needed therapy before, It helps.
it might take time to find one that you can click with, but you need to take care of yourself.
you don't drive a car when your engine is having an existential breakdown.
good luck m8.

 

whAT

 

This feels like a https://www.jw.org/en/ type of thread now

 

I realize that change doesnt happen overnight. Technically i shouldnt be here right now, for if i keep returning it may not seem like things have been changing.
Its too easy to run away, i may have my faults, i may not be perfect, but i can take small steps each day..and soon i'll find that strength i need.

 

Hey man, I highly suggest a therapist and get the weight off your shoulders. There isn't much this community can do or help you with, unfortunately. Your narrative is an interesting one, I do hope one day you come to terms with yourself. I'm no expert but I see a person that is lost. Find your purpose and best of luck